I'm not even going to pretend to be impartial in the Lansdowne Live debate here in Ottawa. I'm a football guy and I want desperately for CFL football to return to the nation's capital. But to be fair there have been a lot of good arguments from those opposed to the project which must be addressed. The good news is I think we can find common ground. All it takes is a little compromise; take a step back and look at things from the other side's viewpoint then work together to find solutions to the contentious issues that are suitable to both parties. That is what I set out to do with the solutions I am proposing below and I think I have achieved my objective with flying colours. I have already forwarded these suggestions to the Lansdowne Live development group as well as the Glebe Residents Association and Councillor Clive Doucet and early reaction has been quite positive.
Here are the contentious issues and my proposed solutions.
Issue 1: Glebe residents are complaining about the druken and obnoxious behaviour in their neighborhoods by intoxicated football fans. This is understandable. There's no question that some football fans can be quite belligerent when they've had too much to drink. I should know, I'm one of those fans and I'm as belligerent as they come when I'm drunk.
Solution: The solution to this one is simple: Add a strip club to the Lansdowne Live project. This will get the "riff-raff" off the streets after the game and into one central location. And with the price of beer in those places nobody has more than one or two pints. So after a sobering two or three hours in the strip club nursing a couple of slow pints there will be a lot less drunken debauchery for police and residents to deal with.
Issue 2: Clive Doucet claims that the Lansdowne Live project does not provide enough green space for Glebe residents. This is fair. Having easy access to green space is important, especially for those living in the downtown core.
Solution: This may require additional costs but I propose that as part of this project a canal be built running right through the Glebe. We could build locks and link this canal to the Ottawa river and provide a navigable waterway all the way to Kingston. Then on either side of the canal we could put acres of green space and bike paths that could be used by the entire city for jogging, biking, rollerblading, picnics, etc. We could even freeze the canal over in the winter and turn it into the world's longest skating rink. I think if this canal were in place there would be sufficient green space surrounding it for Glebe residents and the issue of turning only a portion of the current asphalt at Lansdowne park into green space would not be such a contentious one.
Issue 3: Glebe resident are against having cars parked in their neighborhoods during Lansdowne events such as football games. And the indoor parking as proposed by Lansdowne live cannot even come close to satisfying the parking requirements. Again understandable. I'm the parent of a young child myself and I can't stand when there are cars parked on my street, it's a nuisance and it happens to be dangerous with kids running around in between the cars.
Solution: I have the perfect solution to this problem. Actually I'm stealing this from a buddy of mine who proposed this way back in our university days. It was at one of those old Boyd Moving and Storage parties that they held at the Civic Center salons. For some reason my buddy was on a big Rough Rider kick that night and in his drunken stupor was telling anyone who would listen that they should tear down all the housing around Lansdowne park and turn it into parking space for Rough Rider games. We all thought he was nuts but it turns out the guy was a visionary. I propose that all homes within 200 yards of the boundaries of Lansdowne Park be expropriated, torn down, completely leveled and turned into parking lots. This would provide space for approximately 15,000 vehicles. Can you imagine the tailgate parties before Rider games! And best of all no more cars parked on neighborhood streets in the remaining portion of the glebe. A win-win!
Issue 4: Who's gonna pay for all this? There is concern that the taxpayer is going to have to foot the bill for years to come. This is a good point, it is everyone's duty to be fiscally responsible when dealing with public resources.
Solution: With the strip joint and parking infrastructure in place the solution to this is trivial...outdoor rock concerts 5 nights a week. Use the revenue from parking and concessions to help defray the costs of the project. And remember how a portion of Senator ticket prices were used to pay for the 417 off-ramp? How about having $2 from every lap dance go directly to funding Lansdowne Live. I've crunched the numbers and there is no way that this would be a losing venture.
Issue 5: Too much automobile traffic in the streets going to and from Lansdowne Live, particularly during major events. Another good point by the Glebe residents. Everyone prefers a peaceful environment. And with children playing in the street the more traffic the more dangerous it is.
Solution: Again I go back to my university days when some friends got some scrap wood, some empty oil drums and a small outboard motor and built a barge to make the trek along the canal from Ottawa U to Lansdowne for the Panda Game. We thought they were crazy also but I think they may have had something. Instead of people driving to events at Lansdowne they can enjoy dinner or a few drinks in the city core then be "barged" to the event. The result would be a huge reduction in traffic so Glebe residents no longer have to worry as much about their children playing in the street. Of course parents who let their children swim in the canal will now have to worry more, but who cares, they're probably lousy parents anyway!
Issue 6: Clive Doucet insists that bids be open to an international design competition. The "Deuce" is right on, there is no way that we have the intelligence and expertise in this city to design our own stadium and residential and commercial buildings. We'd mess it all up for sure.
Solution: I agree with the international design concept but instead of wasting millions on an new design I propose we just re-use another highly successful international design project...the Olympic Stadium. I'm sure the plans to that thing are still locked up somewhere in Paris so get a hold of those and away we go...a world class facility that can be built for under $2 billion. Everyone is happy. We get our football stadium and the "Deuce" gets to brag to his socialite friends that it was designed by a bunch of Euros and not by some peasant Ottawa company.
I think that covers it. These solutions may require a few tweaks but I think this could be a major step forward in the adoption of Landsdowne Live. Let me know what you think and I'll see you at the first tailgate....8am sharp! Go Riders Go!!
Tuesday, September 29, 2009
Monday, September 28, 2009
Tiger Wins the Cup!! Tiger Wins the Cup!!
When I was a kid growing up in the 70's everything was about sports and dreams of glory. If I wasn't scoring the Stanley Cup winning goal, I was hitting a home run to win the World Series or tossing the winning touchdown pass for the Minnesota Vikings in the Super-Bowl or for the Ottawa Rough Riders in the Grey Cup. And of course when I knocked my whiffle ball into the hole in my backyard with a 7 iron it was to win.....the Fedex Cup! What else?
My cheap attempt at humour aside, I know the Fedex cup has taken a lot of heat since its inception but I think this year it actually worked. And I don't mean the way the BCS sometimes works in determining a proper College Football Championship game: by chance. I think the formula, whatever it is, really works or at the very least is getting there. For one thing the tweaks to the formula this year ensured that there would never be the situation again where the thing could be wrapped up before the final tournament. That was disastrous last year. And as I watched the leaders play the front nine on Sunday I can honestly say that I was intrigued at the possibilities for the day. So for me I think they got it right. For those who still think it doesn't work let me ask you this: what would you do differently to make it better?
Personally I can't really think of anything significantly better because the fact of the matter is that golf, in this context, has largely become a victim of its own success. The major championships have so much tradition and have become such huge events now that it's simply impossible for any "manufactured" event to match up. It just isn't going to happen. Add to that the raw emotion of the Ryder Cup and the intrigue of the Players Championship at TPC Sawgrass and you have a situation where the end of year tournaments are always destined to be second class citizens. But in my opinion the PGA Tour did manage to make the best of difficult situation with its Fedex setup this year.
Has the $10 million dollar first prize generated excitement for golf fans? I don't think so, not directly anyway. I think those first few Skins games back in the 80's were the last time people actually cared about how much money was riding on a putt. With all the money flying around these days I believe, as fans, we've basically become immune to the size of the purse. But the $10 Million dollar prize did matter to the players and most importantly it ensured that Tiger Woods would participate in all 4 playoff events, and that, more than anything is what made the Fedex Cup a relative success.
You know how they always say "no player is bigger than the game" well as far as professional golf is concerned Tiger Woods is the game. And that is coming from someone who is not a huge Woods fan. Simply put, without Woods' presence in the final 2 majors last year interest dropped significantly but without Tiger's involvement in the end of year tournaments they essentially fall completely off the radar screen.
So congratulations to Tiger for taking his second Fedex Cup. That's two more than Jack ever won. Congrats to Hefty for winning the Tour Championship and setting himself up nicely for a return to prominence in 2010. And most of all congratulations to the PGA Tour for at least making the final month and a half of the season something worth watching.
My cheap attempt at humour aside, I know the Fedex cup has taken a lot of heat since its inception but I think this year it actually worked. And I don't mean the way the BCS sometimes works in determining a proper College Football Championship game: by chance. I think the formula, whatever it is, really works or at the very least is getting there. For one thing the tweaks to the formula this year ensured that there would never be the situation again where the thing could be wrapped up before the final tournament. That was disastrous last year. And as I watched the leaders play the front nine on Sunday I can honestly say that I was intrigued at the possibilities for the day. So for me I think they got it right. For those who still think it doesn't work let me ask you this: what would you do differently to make it better?
Personally I can't really think of anything significantly better because the fact of the matter is that golf, in this context, has largely become a victim of its own success. The major championships have so much tradition and have become such huge events now that it's simply impossible for any "manufactured" event to match up. It just isn't going to happen. Add to that the raw emotion of the Ryder Cup and the intrigue of the Players Championship at TPC Sawgrass and you have a situation where the end of year tournaments are always destined to be second class citizens. But in my opinion the PGA Tour did manage to make the best of difficult situation with its Fedex setup this year.
Has the $10 million dollar first prize generated excitement for golf fans? I don't think so, not directly anyway. I think those first few Skins games back in the 80's were the last time people actually cared about how much money was riding on a putt. With all the money flying around these days I believe, as fans, we've basically become immune to the size of the purse. But the $10 Million dollar prize did matter to the players and most importantly it ensured that Tiger Woods would participate in all 4 playoff events, and that, more than anything is what made the Fedex Cup a relative success.
You know how they always say "no player is bigger than the game" well as far as professional golf is concerned Tiger Woods is the game. And that is coming from someone who is not a huge Woods fan. Simply put, without Woods' presence in the final 2 majors last year interest dropped significantly but without Tiger's involvement in the end of year tournaments they essentially fall completely off the radar screen.
So congratulations to Tiger for taking his second Fedex Cup. That's two more than Jack ever won. Congrats to Hefty for winning the Tour Championship and setting himself up nicely for a return to prominence in 2010. And most of all congratulations to the PGA Tour for at least making the final month and a half of the season something worth watching.
Saturday, September 12, 2009
The End of a Hockey Dream
I now know how it feels when a parent comes to the realization that their child does not have what it takes to make it all the way. When it's blatantly apparent that time has run out. I can't blame my son, he's doing his best. And I know it's not healthy to live your dreams through your child but everything was going so well. From the moment he could crawl I had a mini stick in his hand. As soon as he could stand I had him on bob skates. Then came formal skating lessons and finally the key element that was going to put him over the top....that's right, the backyard rink! Backbreaking nights shovelling that rink. Remember the winter of 2008? It was all worth it with the dream so close to becoming reality. But it all ended tonight, right there in the bleachers of Mlacak arena. Mlacak! I don't even know how to pronounce it, but that's where it all came crashing down...at the Kanata Minor Hockey Association 5 year old initiation sort-outs.
I knew we were in trouble during warmups. While the other children were skating around the ice, some struggling to stand, others motoring around impressively, my son was in the center ice circle, practicing what he and I have come to call "the move". It's this thing he does where he takes a few strides then starts gliding while slaloming from side to side like a skier. I have no idea where he got "the move" but I knew I was in trouble when he pulled it out during warmups. Then the drills started and things went from bad to worse. He had met up with one of his favorite kindergarten mates in the dressing room and the two of them were goofing off while the coaches were giving the instructions. Imagine that, on the most important night of his life there's my 5 year old playing the fool with his buddy while the coach walked through the drill. From station to station he went, with no idea which cone to skate to or when to switch from forward to backward crossovers.
My wife arrived a third of the way through and she could tell something was wrong. She tried to console me but there was no use. We watched together as he pulled "the move" time after time, even as the coaches were imploring him to skate hard. Did he not understand the magnitude of the situation? This was sort-outs! Then as he moved to the station right in front of us he did the unforgiveable. He looked up at us with a huge smile on his face and started waving. I was furious! What did he think he was supposed to be doing out there? Having fun?
By the time the practice had come to an end I had given up all hope. But as I made my way down to meet my boy and walk him to the dressing room I knew I had to be strong; that it was my job to give him support in this time of need. I'll give the kid credit though, he put on a brave face, giggling and horsing around with his school buddy as I got him undressed like nothing had happened. His buddy's father asked me if this was my son's first year? When I said yes he commented on how well he was skating. Nice guy I thought, rubbing it in! Then I did what any self respecting hockey dad would do, I quickly got him out of his gear and stormed out of that place.
On the quiet drive home I thought about whether my reaction was appropriate. Was I making too much of one bad night? He's only 5 after all. Did he still have a future in hockey? Years of early morning practices together, tournaments, road trips, mini sticks in hotel hallways? Is it possible that minor hockey is really all about having fun, goofing around with your buddies in the dressing room?
Nah!
Then a second thought came to my mind that lifted my spirits. Kanata Basketball Association "Small Ball" sort-outs are only three weeks away! Three weeks to work on that left hand move to the basket. Look out baby, here we come!
I knew we were in trouble during warmups. While the other children were skating around the ice, some struggling to stand, others motoring around impressively, my son was in the center ice circle, practicing what he and I have come to call "the move". It's this thing he does where he takes a few strides then starts gliding while slaloming from side to side like a skier. I have no idea where he got "the move" but I knew I was in trouble when he pulled it out during warmups. Then the drills started and things went from bad to worse. He had met up with one of his favorite kindergarten mates in the dressing room and the two of them were goofing off while the coaches were giving the instructions. Imagine that, on the most important night of his life there's my 5 year old playing the fool with his buddy while the coach walked through the drill. From station to station he went, with no idea which cone to skate to or when to switch from forward to backward crossovers.
My wife arrived a third of the way through and she could tell something was wrong. She tried to console me but there was no use. We watched together as he pulled "the move" time after time, even as the coaches were imploring him to skate hard. Did he not understand the magnitude of the situation? This was sort-outs! Then as he moved to the station right in front of us he did the unforgiveable. He looked up at us with a huge smile on his face and started waving. I was furious! What did he think he was supposed to be doing out there? Having fun?
By the time the practice had come to an end I had given up all hope. But as I made my way down to meet my boy and walk him to the dressing room I knew I had to be strong; that it was my job to give him support in this time of need. I'll give the kid credit though, he put on a brave face, giggling and horsing around with his school buddy as I got him undressed like nothing had happened. His buddy's father asked me if this was my son's first year? When I said yes he commented on how well he was skating. Nice guy I thought, rubbing it in! Then I did what any self respecting hockey dad would do, I quickly got him out of his gear and stormed out of that place.
On the quiet drive home I thought about whether my reaction was appropriate. Was I making too much of one bad night? He's only 5 after all. Did he still have a future in hockey? Years of early morning practices together, tournaments, road trips, mini sticks in hotel hallways? Is it possible that minor hockey is really all about having fun, goofing around with your buddies in the dressing room?
Nah!
Then a second thought came to my mind that lifted my spirits. Kanata Basketball Association "Small Ball" sort-outs are only three weeks away! Three weeks to work on that left hand move to the basket. Look out baby, here we come!
Friday, September 11, 2009
Leave Heatley Alone!
The day of reckoning is fast approaching! The Senator's annual golf tournament goes today and rumors are that Heater's on his way back to town sometime in the next few days. Old number fifteen. Enemy number one! To be honest I've been rather shocked at the fan and media reaction to my man Heater's off season act. It seems like the whole city is out for blood but I'm here to tell you that there's at least one guy left in Ottawa, a season ticket holder at that, who has Heater's back.
While the Heatley trade demand has obviously shocked everyone in the hockey world, when you take a step back is it really that surprising? Honestly, why would a young guy with Heatley's looks and charisma want to be stuck in a backwater town like Ottawa? This guy belongs in LA or New York where the action is. Making movies, dating starlets, being seen at clubs. He should be running with the likes of Paris Hilton or Snoop Dog or whoever the hell the A-list celebrities are these days. Who's he supposed to roll with here in Ottawa, Max Keeping? Wayne Rostad? And name me one place where a guy can be "seen" after 10 pm in this town. The salad bar at Scores Chicken House? "How about some more croutons out here junior? I'm Danny freakin' Heatley!"
If Heatley had any backers before the infamous press conference he certainly had a lot fewer after it. But I'm sticking with him and to be honest I can see his point. This guy's a star, a 3 time 50 goal man, a member of Team Canada. He's a dedicated athlete who spends hours in the gym over the course of a year. Just take a look at his physique...maybe tens of hours. Why should he be made the scapegoat for an under performing team? Why should he be the one who's sent to the second powerplay unit? Why should he be forced to skate hard and backcheck? He's Danny freaking Heatley! Sure, it might look like he's dogging it but do you know how much energy it takes to skate up and down the ice holding your stick up over your head? Try it sometime.
The one thing more than anything that seemed to upset Ottawa fans and media alike was Heatley's explanation for rejecting the proposed trade to Edmonton, that being needing "more options". Hey who among us does not want options in deciding our future? I know I do. In fact the day of Heatley's presser I was given a rather unpleasant assignment by my manager. Inspired by Danny's "options" justification I walked into my manager's office that afternoon and let him know in no uncertain terms that I wasn't doing any work on my assigned task until I was given more options. And guess what? It worked! My boss immediately gave me a second option. Unfortunately I can't print it here. In the end I chose the first option but the point is, like Danny, all I really wanted was more options. That's all the guy's asking for....OPTIONS! Is that so unreasonable?
While Heatley's press conference was almost universally panned for being nothing but lip service, what people refuse to acknowledge is the level of character Danny showed toward the end of the presser when his representative stated that they would take no more questions; press conference over. Most guys in his position after being forced to recite vague, scripted answers for a good 20 minutes would have taken that opportunity to bolt, but not Heater. He immediately interrupted his agent and bravely stated that he would take "two more questions". TWO MORE! Above and beyond the call of duty if you ask me. I really think that was Danny's way of paying back Ottawa fans for their support over the past four years. Either that or his flunkies hadn't yet returned from gassing up his boat and picking up the beer for their afternoon on lake Okanagan. Either way, how can you take cheap shots at a guy who takes time out of his extremely busy off season to give vague, scripted answers to two additional questions. What a guy! And he does it all for under $8 million a year!
Let's face it folks, it's gonna be ugly. Whether he arrives today or this weekend, like an army of jilted lovers the Ottawa hockey community will be ready to pounce. I say give the guy a break; turn the other cheek. The guy's been through a lot already. Word is he was so broken up over this mess it was all he could do to drag himself out to the nightly Okanagan lakeside beach party. Oh he made them all, and was usually the last to leave, but witnesses say this affair was weighing heavily on him. Heater's been through hell these past 3 months my friends and it can only get worse. The poor kid; you couldn't pay me enough to be in that guys shoes. Not even 8 MILLION DOLLARS!
While the Heatley trade demand has obviously shocked everyone in the hockey world, when you take a step back is it really that surprising? Honestly, why would a young guy with Heatley's looks and charisma want to be stuck in a backwater town like Ottawa? This guy belongs in LA or New York where the action is. Making movies, dating starlets, being seen at clubs. He should be running with the likes of Paris Hilton or Snoop Dog or whoever the hell the A-list celebrities are these days. Who's he supposed to roll with here in Ottawa, Max Keeping? Wayne Rostad? And name me one place where a guy can be "seen" after 10 pm in this town. The salad bar at Scores Chicken House? "How about some more croutons out here junior? I'm Danny freakin' Heatley!"
If Heatley had any backers before the infamous press conference he certainly had a lot fewer after it. But I'm sticking with him and to be honest I can see his point. This guy's a star, a 3 time 50 goal man, a member of Team Canada. He's a dedicated athlete who spends hours in the gym over the course of a year. Just take a look at his physique...maybe tens of hours. Why should he be made the scapegoat for an under performing team? Why should he be the one who's sent to the second powerplay unit? Why should he be forced to skate hard and backcheck? He's Danny freaking Heatley! Sure, it might look like he's dogging it but do you know how much energy it takes to skate up and down the ice holding your stick up over your head? Try it sometime.
The one thing more than anything that seemed to upset Ottawa fans and media alike was Heatley's explanation for rejecting the proposed trade to Edmonton, that being needing "more options". Hey who among us does not want options in deciding our future? I know I do. In fact the day of Heatley's presser I was given a rather unpleasant assignment by my manager. Inspired by Danny's "options" justification I walked into my manager's office that afternoon and let him know in no uncertain terms that I wasn't doing any work on my assigned task until I was given more options. And guess what? It worked! My boss immediately gave me a second option. Unfortunately I can't print it here. In the end I chose the first option but the point is, like Danny, all I really wanted was more options. That's all the guy's asking for....OPTIONS! Is that so unreasonable?
While Heatley's press conference was almost universally panned for being nothing but lip service, what people refuse to acknowledge is the level of character Danny showed toward the end of the presser when his representative stated that they would take no more questions; press conference over. Most guys in his position after being forced to recite vague, scripted answers for a good 20 minutes would have taken that opportunity to bolt, but not Heater. He immediately interrupted his agent and bravely stated that he would take "two more questions". TWO MORE! Above and beyond the call of duty if you ask me. I really think that was Danny's way of paying back Ottawa fans for their support over the past four years. Either that or his flunkies hadn't yet returned from gassing up his boat and picking up the beer for their afternoon on lake Okanagan. Either way, how can you take cheap shots at a guy who takes time out of his extremely busy off season to give vague, scripted answers to two additional questions. What a guy! And he does it all for under $8 million a year!
Let's face it folks, it's gonna be ugly. Whether he arrives today or this weekend, like an army of jilted lovers the Ottawa hockey community will be ready to pounce. I say give the guy a break; turn the other cheek. The guy's been through a lot already. Word is he was so broken up over this mess it was all he could do to drag himself out to the nightly Okanagan lakeside beach party. Oh he made them all, and was usually the last to leave, but witnesses say this affair was weighing heavily on him. Heater's been through hell these past 3 months my friends and it can only get worse. The poor kid; you couldn't pay me enough to be in that guys shoes. Not even 8 MILLION DOLLARS!
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